Many of us have previously been in relationships with people we thought were “the one” then something happens and you realize that perhaps your partner is not who they first seemed to be. This does not necessarily mean that your experiences have been negative; in fact, some may look back and recall those relationships with fondness. But getting to know if you and the other person will work out means that sometimes, you will find out that they don’t. And that’s okay, it’s a part of growth and life. As you ponder this, enjoy this comforting story from Mr. Moushon, just in time for Valentine's Day.
“You work too much!” It’s a common refrain and mostly true. It’s one thing when your friends tell you this; it’s another entirely when it’s the new girlfriend. You may not know this, but it’s hard to maintain relationships as a chef. It’s nigh impossible when you’re the sous chef at a new restaurant. Worried that the new girl was about to be old news, I decided to talk to my head chef. Tall, wide, grumpy and Albanian, he lives for work and assumes I‘m the same. To say the least, Fatos is an intimidating guy. I start sheepishly, “OK, so hear me out.” He’s stone-faced. Did I pick a bad time? “Um, so … there’s this girl. She lives in Cambridge; she studies at one of the good colleges. Can I … um … I need a day off?” I prepare for the worst. You know Gordon Ramsey? Imagine a meaner, eastern European version of that. Strangely, instead of an inferno of belittling swear words, I get a hearty slap on the back. After a few words of encouragement and some unknown hand gestures I can assume are vulgar, I have a day off!
When you’re young, special occasions hold a lot of meaning. Birthdays, Valentine’s Day, Christmas, these are times to go all out with the object of your affection. When you’re a chef, you miss all these dates, so when you get a chance to make it up, you go big. I had the perfect day planned. We were going to do all her favorite things: coffee, shopping, bookstores and fancy dinner. In the middle was the crown jewel, a picnic on the River Cam. In addition to the university, Cambridge is known for its river and the ubiquitous punts that fill its water in the summer. The punt is a long, flat-bottomed boat, and a long pole propels it. I’d rented one for this perfect summer day, and we were going to have a picnic while floating past the colleges. With my trusty Nikon F100 in hand, we packed up our lunch, boarded our punt and pushed off.
So far, the day was going perfectly! I’d push us along; we’d stop every now and again for snacks and photos. One of the best sites in Cambridge is the Bridge of Sighs, and it’s only viewable from a punt. After a brief photo stop, I jumped back on my perch and pushed off. Punting takes a bit of practice, but once you get it down, you can scoot along with ease. All you need to do is firmly hold the pole, drop it straight down, and push. Drop, push, pull, that’s the pattern. As we pushed past the bridge, we came up to the small footbridge that connects the colleges on either side. We were chatting away, and I wasn’t paying attention. Almost on autopilot, I was just dropping and pushing. I dropped the pole and pushed, and it wouldn’t budge. I quickly looked up and realized the water was much shallower under around the footbridge, and my pole was standing at a 90-degree angle, stuck in the mud and against the bridge. With the boat quickly moving along and the pole stuck, I had to act in about 2 seconds. A smart person would have let go and rowed back with the oar in the punt. I chose the path less traveled. I held firmly onto the pole and watched the punt quickly go out from under my feet. I should have fallen in the water, but this story is much more embarrassing than that.
Reflexes kicked in, and I instantly reached up and grabbed support from under the bridge. Now I’m hanging from the bridge, feet barely above the water. People fall off their punts all the time. There’s usually a lighthearted cheer from those around, and everyone moves on with their day. Rarely is someone dumb enough to grab onto the bridges. Fortunately for me, I had someone in the boat who could row back. I look up at the punt, and rather than grabbing the oar, my date has gone straight for the camera. Laughing hysterically, she starts clicking away. These were the days before camera phones, so if someone was taking your picture, you knew about it. I quickly realize the clicks aren’t just coming from her camera but a multitude of other punts who’ve slowed down to catch the American hanging from a bridge.
While everyone is having their fun, I realize my grip is starting to give out. Resigned to the inevitable, I let go. A cold plunge and a quick swim later, I’m back in the boat, soaking wet and much less enthused than a few minutes prior. The tone for the day was now dampened, figuratively and literally. I’m a fan of British humor until I become the butt of all the jokes. As the evening goes on, the British jokes wear thin, and the romantic day out becomes more of a dud. We bid goodbye, and I hop on the train home. Back at work the very next day, all the guys in the kitchen want to hear about the day. As I tell my tale, the smiles are turned to cringes as I get to the bridge. Once I finish, I get a few encouraging words and we all get back to work. Right before we do, Fatos walks through the kitchen crew. Before I could speak, he wrapped me up in a giant Albanian bear hug. Clearly, I’m shocked; this is not normal behavior. He puts me down, gives me a slap on the back, and says, “Don’t worry qofte*, maybe she’s not the one.”
*An Albanian term of endearment and condescension, or a nickname for someone who is lazy or does not do much, and it can also mean meatball.
The Student Movement is the official student newspaper of ¶·Å£ÆåÅÆ University. Opinions expressed in the Student Movement are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the editors, ¶·Å£ÆåÅÆ University or the Seventh-day Adventist church.